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Here's the poop. Those wiseguys at King Pup take me for a spin every lunchtime and in return I agree to cast a beady eye over the latest dog related developments and churn out a few words for the perusal of any dog enthusiasts in earshot. It is I feel a quite satisfactory arrangement for the time being and one that I fully intend to maintain until such a time as they've had enough of me, or I become blog-tired and decide to let sleeping blogs lie - whichever comes sooner.

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Man Spoils Fight Between Dog, Shark

September 30th, 2008

Jake LeNoir (pictured), a 28-month old rat terrier from Florida, is furious with his owner tonight after the spoilsporting human broke up a particularly enjoyable fight between him and a shark.
The feisty little pup - who can “handle myself, don’t you worry about that”  - was swimming off New Smyrna beach Monday when the misguided [...]

Dogo Erectus

September 28th, 2008

The movie speaks for itself. Faith the dog was born without her front legs, so without further ado, she walks on two. You go girl!
So what does this tell us? Let me spell it out. It means that dogs are quite capable of walking on two legs all day if we have to. It’s just [...]

Ballgebra

September 25th, 2008

Stop the press! When us dogs catch tennis balls, we’re actually solving very complicated differential equations. This is news to me! There I was thinking that I was just using my eyes and accumulated sense of judgment to hone in on something that’s round, furry and fun to chew. How wrong it was of me [...]

Moron Dog Ruins Photograph

September 24th, 2008

A Cape Cod couple are fuming after their feckless jackass of a dog, Freelance, ruined yet another once-in-a-lifetime photo opportunity for his owners, Harold and Marjorie Hilditch yesterday.
The pair were all set to ensure their place in birdwatching history after they spotted a Broad-Billed Hummingbird - a rare species usually found only in Arizona and [...]

Watson To Thank For Poop Sherlocks

September 22nd, 2008

Watson being, of course, one half of the famed egg-headed duo James Watson and Francis Crick - the chirpy English geezers who unlocked the secrets of life through their discovery of the structure of deoxyribonucleic acid, or “DNA” for those with tight schedules.
They would have literally exploded with pride had they known, all those years [...]

Hotels Court Dog Dollars

September 21st, 2008

It’s a little late in coming, but hotels are finally getting wise to the fact that dogs have disposable income to spend and are more than willing to dispose of that income within the high-end hotel and leisure industry.
For decades, dogs who regularly travel on business or simply for pleasure have been saddled with two [...]

Stop The Violence

September 20th, 2008

Dogs are being tortured for sport in this country - with the approval and encouragement of the mainstream media. Observe, as proof, this depraved article in The Daily Courier of Arizona yesterday.
Apparently it’s not enough that we should have the abhorrent atrocity of soap-contaminated bathing forced upon us - we should also, according to the [...]

Stop Feeding Us Your Crap

September 19th, 2008

It’s official - your human food is low grade junk and is not fit to pass through the superior gut of a dog. We did not evolve to eat the bacon, pasta, bagels, chocolate or Ritz Cheese Crackers that humans inexplicably cram into their funnels on a daily basis.
See, you humans are like train furnaces. [...]

From Wolves to Wimps

September 18th, 2008

Further to my earlier post on the wimpification of dogs, a subject which I feel very strongly about, I would like to draw your attention if I may to the latest atrocity in this conspiracy.
Another dog tournament is afoot, in Howell, Michigan - and this time the winning ribbons are being allocated for such feats [...]

Puppies Asked To Mind Their Own Business

September 17th, 2008

The O’Sullivan puppies of Lanford, IL came under fire again Tuesday as neighbor Ralph Peterson asked them once more to mind their own damn business.
The meddlesome litter, who are rarely seen attending to their own affairs, peered over Peterson’s fence for the last damn time as he attended to various chores in his yard - [...]