Plebeian Dog Insults Local Artists
August 25th, 2008An experimental attempt to expose dogs to culture in Bethlehem, PA, is in serious doubt after an unnamed five month old puppy left a trail of hurt feelings and bruised artistic sensitivities on the town’s Main Street today.
The pernicious pup was seen to ramble cockily through the sidewalk displays of local artisans, heaping scorn upon what one distraught beret wearing, goatee-bearded brush-pusher called his ‘raison d’etre’ before collapsing theatrically in a heap and tearfully pounding the sidewalk with his fists.
“He called my piece ‘whimsical’ and ‘contrived’”, sobbed Peregrine Whittlestaff, a local sculptor and part-time basket weaver - seemingly unaware that art can be one or the other, but not both. “He has this wheezy laugh, like Mutley off of ‘Catch the Pigeon’ - and to be honest with you I don’t know where I’m going to go from here. I think there’s going to be a lot of personal reassessment behind closed doors in Bethlehem tonight.”

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